Story Behind The Song

Toxic or one-sided friendships have changed the way I interact with the world-- it is harder to trust and be confident in my environment.

Song Description

This is a song of emotional trauma and of the long road to recovery. It is sad and resentful, but ultimately hopeful.

Lyrics

I can't care for you anymore
Cuz you don't care for me, and neither do I
I can't love you anymore
Cuz you never loved me, now I see
I can't show you the real me anymore
Cuz she doesn't exist, cuz you drove her to this
I can't show you what I feel anymore
Cuz I don't, I don't feel anything these days
I can't need you like I used to need you
Cuz it's not good to be, only pieces of me
I can't feel you in my heart anymore
So as far as I know, you are gone
I can't
I can't


My head hurts and my body hurts but I'm doing just fine
I am counting and amounting what is yours and what is mine
I try to flee but I can't leave, cuz this city was ours
And all I see are memories of magnolia trees that flower,
Fantasies of power, of having the upper hand

I begged for years and sank my fears, still you didn't treat me well
You left your scars and broke my heart, and still I couldn't tell
I followed you as you followed through with nails through my hands
So blame me once again, I let you ruin me
With fantasies of power, of having the upper hand

I am fine, I will be fine, I will grow to know who I am someday
I am fine, I will be fine, I will grow beyond my past someday

I-I can be the bigger person and I-I can be strong
I-I can be the bigger person and I-I can be, I can be weak

I'm left with fantasies of power, of having the upper hand